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will carry't.
PAGE
Not by my consent, I promise you. The gentleman is
of no having: he kept company with the wild prince
and Poins; he is of too high a region; he knows too
much. No, he shall not knit a knot in his fortunes
with the finger of my substance: if he take her,
let him take her simply; the wealth I have waits on
my consent, and my consent goes not that way.
FORD
I beseech you heartily, some of you go home with me
to dinner: besides your cheer, you shall have
sport; I will show you a monster. Master doctor,
you shall go; so shall you, Master Page; and you, Sir Hugh.
SHALLOW
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Well, fare you well: we shall have the freer wooing
at Master Page's.
Exeunt SHALLOW, and SLENDER
DOCTOR CAIUS
Go home, John Rugby; I come anon.
Exit RUGBY
Host
Farewell, my hearts: I will to my honest knight
Falstaff, and drink canary with him.
Exit
FORD
[Aside]
I think I shall drink in pipe wine first
with him; I'll make him dance. Will you go, gentles?
All
Have with you to see this monster.
Exeunt
Scene 3
A room in FORD'S house.
Enter MISTRESS FORD and MISTRESS PAGE
MISTRESS FORD
What, John! What, Robert!
MISTRESS PAGE
Quickly, quickly! is the buck-basket--
MISTRESS FORD
I warrant. What, Robin, I say!
Enter Servants with a basket
MISTRESS PAGE
Come, come, come.
MISTRESS FORD
Here, set it down.
MISTRESS PAGE
Give your men the charge; we must be brief.
MISTRESS FORD
Marry, as I told you before, John and Robert, be
ready here hard by in the brew-house: and when I
suddenly call you, come forth, and without any pause
or staggering take this basket on your shoulders:
that done, trudge with it in all haste, and carry
it among the whitsters in Datchet-mead, and there
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empty it in the muddy ditch close by the Thames side.
MISTRESS PAGE
You will do it?
MISTRESS FORD
I ha' told them over and over; they lack no
direction. Be gone, and come when you are called.
Exeunt Servants
MISTRESS PAGE
Here comes little Robin.
Enter ROBIN
MISTRESS FORD
How now, my eyas-musket! what news with you?
ROBIN
My master, Sir John, is come in at your back-door,
Mistress Ford, and requests your company.
MISTRESS PAGE
You little Jack-a-Lent, have you been true to us?
ROBIN
Ay, I'll be sworn. My master knows not of your
being here and hath threatened to put me into
everlasting liberty if I tell you of it; for he
swears he'll turn me away.
MISTRESS PAGE
Thou'rt a good boy: this secrecy of thine shall be
a tailor to thee and shall make thee a new doublet
and hose. I'll go hide me.
MISTRESS FORD
Do so. Go tell thy master I am alone.
Exit ROBIN
Mistress Page, remember you your cue.
MISTRESS PAGE
I warrant thee; if I do not act it, hiss me.
Exit
MISTRESS FORD
Go to, then: we'll use this unwholesome humidity,
this gross watery pumpion; we'll teach him to know
turtles from jays.
Enter FALSTAFF
FALSTAFF
Have I caught thee, my heavenly jewel? Why, now let
me die, for I have lived long enough: this is the
period of my ambition: O this blessed hour!
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MISTRESS FORD
O sweet Sir John!
FALSTAFF
Mistress Ford, I cannot cog, I cannot prate,
Mistress Ford. Now shall I sin in my wish: I would
thy husband were dead: I'll speak it before the
best lord; I would make thee my lady.
MISTRESS FORD
I your lady, Sir John! alas, I should be a pitiful lady!
FALSTAFF
Let the court of France show me such another. I see
how thine eye would emulate the diamond: thou hast
the right arched beauty of the brow that becomes the
ship-tire, the tire-valiant, or any tire of
Venetian admittance.
MISTRESS FORD
A plain kerchief, Sir John: my brows become nothing
else; nor that well neither.
FALSTAFF
By the Lord, thou art a traitor to say so: thou
wouldst make an absolute courtier; and the firm
fixture of thy foot would give an excellent motion
to thy gait in a semi-circled farthingale. I see
what thou wert, if Fortune thy foe were not, Nature
thy friend. Come, thou canst not hide it.
MISTRESS FORD
Believe me, there is no such thing in me.
FALSTAFF
What made me love thee? let that persuade thee
there's something extraordinary in thee. Come, I
cannot cog and say thou art this and that, like a
many of these lisping hawthorn-buds, that come like
women in men's apparel, and smell like Bucklersbury
in simple time; I cannot: but I love thee; none
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